Father's Day 2024: Our Favourite Dad Jokes

To celebrate Father’s Day this year we asked you to send us some of your favourite ‘dad jokes’, in association with our friends at Jericho Comedy. A great ‘dad joke’ is a real art form - the perfect mix of funny, corny and a little bit groanworthy that you only reach once you know a kid or two to embarrass. Here are some of our favourites from our Daily Info followers (as well as some of our own!).

1. How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

-Our winning entry - congrats for giving us a good chuckle with just the right level of blasphemy.

2. Two fish in a tank, one goes to the other, how do you drive this thing?

A joke so nice it was submitted twice! One entrant told us, “My husband thinks this is the funniest joke ever. I cringe/sigh every time.” Embrace the cringe, we say!

3. Everyone these days seems to be tracing their ancestors. Even Goldilocks is looking for her forebears.

- One more bear than we’re used to, but we still think this gag is just right.

4. Why did the one-handed man cross the road?

To get to the second hand shop!

- Both a joke and a heartwarming tale of perseverance; we love to see it.

5.Why did the Mexican man push his wife off a cliff?


- Daily Info would like to go on record to say that we do not condone pushing your or anyone else’s spouse off a cliff, but we have to give credit for a 10/10 pun game.

6. Why do you have to leave the Père-Lachaise cemetery in Paris the way that you went in?

Because no matter how hard you search, you will only ever find one of the Doors.

- A cerebral one for that noble breed of dad, the dad-rocker.

7. Do you know the French for a set of dentures?

Apéritif !

- Apologies to our French-speaking followers, but we couldn’t resist!

8. I’ve been dreaming I’m a horse…..it’s been 5 nights on the trot!

- In all seriousness, sleep equestrianism is no laughing matter - if you’ve woken up wearing a pair of metal shoes or have developed a sudden craving for hay, we suggest contacting your GP.

And of course we had to get in on the fun ourselves - here are some of the Daily Info staffers’ best fatherly goofs:

9. What do you call a dog that meditates?

Aware Wolf!

10. I went to the aquarium this weekend, but I didn’t stay long. There’s something fishy about that place.

11. Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate nine.

12. What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.

13. I bought the world’s worst thesaurus today. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible!

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